Being from a large, powerful country with vast entertainment exports, I often bump into the phenomenon that most people in the world watch Hollywood films and as such, think themselves experts on the United States. Everyone in the world has an opinion on George Bush, 80% of the people in the world have some sort of 9/11 conspiracy theory involving brainwashed stupid Americans that they desperately need to share with me, and a good number of people really do buy into the stereotype that Americans know nothing about the world outside their backyards, thanks to YouTube videos like the one above.
But this air of superiority breaks down when U.S. geography comes up, because the reality is that most Turks' knowledge of the U.S. is limited to Los Angeles, New York, Boston, Dallas, Miami, and Chicago (and not only Turks, this applies to a significant chunk of the global population, even the most educated). They're not sure whether California is a city or a state, most are surprised to hear that Alaska is part of the USA, and they're blown away by the fact that we have fifty states spanning 3,000 miles of continent.
This odd gap between perceived knowledge and actual knowledge results in some hilarious conversations when well-intentioned people want to know where in the U.S. I'm from. Inexplicably, everyone frames the question in the same bizarre way: "Which city are you from? For example, California, New York..." forcing me into a brief explanation of the difference between a city and a state and which category Texas and Miami fall into. Turkey is divided into regions as well, and people often state their geographical roots by region, meaning that when they say the name of a familiar city, they could very well mean a village 100 miles outside the city. But the American fashion of listing both city and state, or often just state if it's a small town, is completely incomprehensible to them.
For me, the most entertaining part of being from Missouri is the fact that nobody outside the USA has ever heard of Missouri. The other entertaining point is that our country has multiple states beginning with the letter "M," which all sound the same to untrained ears and causes great chaos when trying to help people locate Missouri on their mental maps of the USA. The question "Where are you from?" never has a simple answer because people want to have heard of my hometown, but the fact is they generally haven't. To date, I've met only two people here who knew anything about Missouri. One was a Turkish guy who spent a summer working in Joplin, driving an ice cream truck through a summer work and travel program. The other was a French guy who spouted an almost encyclopedic knowledge of small Missouri towns with French names, but I'm fairly certain this was the result of a Google search he performed to hide the fact that he fibbed when he initially told me he'd heard of Missouri. Most people simply respond to my answer with a flat, "Ohhh," in the tone that people adopt when they have no idea what you're talking about but don't want to admit it.
But here are the top five best reactions I've had so far in trying to explain U.S. geography to people who aren't afraid to proudly display their ignorance, an attitude which I commend because they are the people who end up learning something from the conversation.
5. "You're from MISERY?" (cliche, but it shows this person's grasp of the English language, so props.)
4. "Where are you from in the USA?"
"Missouri."
"No, I mean like which city, for example, New York, California..."
"Missouri. It's a state."
"New York?"
"No, Missouri. There is a state called Missouri."
"A state?"
"Yes."
"Which city? New York?"
"No."
(The really sad part is that this conversation has occurred more than once.)
3. "Missouri! That's in the south, right?"
"Nope, that's Mississippi."
"But Boston is there, right?"
"Nope, that's Massachusetts."
"Near the lakes?"
"That's Michigan."
"Near Canada?"
"That's Minnesota."
"In that case I have absolutely no idea where Missouri is."
"You get half credit for knowing Michigan."
"Are all these places real?"
2. "I'm from Missouri. It's a state in the center of the United States, near the Mississippi River."
"Oh, ok. I know the Mississippi River. Which city?"
"It's a small city called Columbia."
"Columbia! I know Columbia!"
"You do?"
"Yes, of course! It's in South America! You're from South America? Do you speak Spanish?"
"No..."
1. "I know Missouri! It's very famous."
"Really? Are you sure?"
"Yeah, there was a movie about it."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes! People talk funny there, right? Like 'O ya sure, dontcha know.' "
"Nope, that's Minnesota."
(Unfortunately there is no way to capture in writing what it sounds like when a Turkish person tries to imitate a Minnesota accent. Suffice it to say I started choking on my tea and couldn't breathe for about a minute.)
But this air of superiority breaks down when U.S. geography comes up, because the reality is that most Turks' knowledge of the U.S. is limited to Los Angeles, New York, Boston, Dallas, Miami, and Chicago (and not only Turks, this applies to a significant chunk of the global population, even the most educated). They're not sure whether California is a city or a state, most are surprised to hear that Alaska is part of the USA, and they're blown away by the fact that we have fifty states spanning 3,000 miles of continent.
This odd gap between perceived knowledge and actual knowledge results in some hilarious conversations when well-intentioned people want to know where in the U.S. I'm from. Inexplicably, everyone frames the question in the same bizarre way: "Which city are you from? For example, California, New York..." forcing me into a brief explanation of the difference between a city and a state and which category Texas and Miami fall into. Turkey is divided into regions as well, and people often state their geographical roots by region, meaning that when they say the name of a familiar city, they could very well mean a village 100 miles outside the city. But the American fashion of listing both city and state, or often just state if it's a small town, is completely incomprehensible to them.
For me, the most entertaining part of being from Missouri is the fact that nobody outside the USA has ever heard of Missouri. The other entertaining point is that our country has multiple states beginning with the letter "M," which all sound the same to untrained ears and causes great chaos when trying to help people locate Missouri on their mental maps of the USA. The question "Where are you from?" never has a simple answer because people want to have heard of my hometown, but the fact is they generally haven't. To date, I've met only two people here who knew anything about Missouri. One was a Turkish guy who spent a summer working in Joplin, driving an ice cream truck through a summer work and travel program. The other was a French guy who spouted an almost encyclopedic knowledge of small Missouri towns with French names, but I'm fairly certain this was the result of a Google search he performed to hide the fact that he fibbed when he initially told me he'd heard of Missouri. Most people simply respond to my answer with a flat, "Ohhh," in the tone that people adopt when they have no idea what you're talking about but don't want to admit it.
But here are the top five best reactions I've had so far in trying to explain U.S. geography to people who aren't afraid to proudly display their ignorance, an attitude which I commend because they are the people who end up learning something from the conversation.
5. "You're from MISERY?" (cliche, but it shows this person's grasp of the English language, so props.)
4. "Where are you from in the USA?"
"Missouri."
"No, I mean like which city, for example, New York, California..."
"Missouri. It's a state."
"New York?"
"No, Missouri. There is a state called Missouri."
"A state?"
"Yes."
"Which city? New York?"
"No."
(The really sad part is that this conversation has occurred more than once.)
3. "Missouri! That's in the south, right?"
"Nope, that's Mississippi."
"But Boston is there, right?"
"Nope, that's Massachusetts."
"Near the lakes?"
"That's Michigan."
"Near Canada?"
"That's Minnesota."
"In that case I have absolutely no idea where Missouri is."
"You get half credit for knowing Michigan."
"Are all these places real?"
2. "I'm from Missouri. It's a state in the center of the United States, near the Mississippi River."
"Oh, ok. I know the Mississippi River. Which city?"
"It's a small city called Columbia."
"Columbia! I know Columbia!"
"You do?"
"Yes, of course! It's in South America! You're from South America? Do you speak Spanish?"
"No..."
1. "I know Missouri! It's very famous."
"Really? Are you sure?"
"Yeah, there was a movie about it."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes! People talk funny there, right? Like 'O ya sure, dontcha know.' "
"Nope, that's Minnesota."
(Unfortunately there is no way to capture in writing what it sounds like when a Turkish person tries to imitate a Minnesota accent. Suffice it to say I started choking on my tea and couldn't breathe for about a minute.)
ha! this is great. my favorite is #3. i have very similar experiences in China. let's face it, most people from the US can't remember which "M" state i'm from either. :)
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